There are ONLY 2 choices! Love or Fear! The love or fear mindset is at the heart of every decision we make. In fact, the love or fear mindset influences how we see the world and approach every challenge.
When you think about all the choices you’ve made…really think about them—where did they originate from? The default mode for many people is to choose from FEAR. But embracing a mindset rooted in love or fear can help us make more conscious decisions.
- Choosing from fear looks like staying in a relationship past its expiration date or not getting into a relationship because you might get hurt. This is just one example of making choices from a fear or love mindset.
- Choosing from fear looks like staying in a deadened job instead of going for your dream career. In situations like this, reflecting on whether love or fear mindset is guiding your actions can be enlightening.
- Choosing from fear looks like keeping your mouth shut when you know you have something valuable to say – or just something to say.
- Choosing from love is saying I love you first – even if you’re afraid you won’t hear it back. Truly, this is acting from a love or fear mindset in its purest form.
- Choosing from love is following your heart instead of some made up reality of the future that you have no idea will manifest.
- Choosing from love is preparing yourself for your dream career even if you may never get there.
- Choosing from love is keeping your heart open and not twisting what people say and do into something that disempowers you.
Part of understanding how fear drives so many of our decisions includes recognizing misplaced trust and why we don’t trust — how past hurts lead us to give trust too freely in some situations and hold it too tightly in others. These patterns are based not on the reality in front of us but on the story our fear-based interpretations have created.
Part of choosing from love instead of fear is a willingness to take responsibility in relationships — to notice where fear‑based reactions have shaped your choices. Then you can intentionally respond from honesty, courage, and care. Remember, the love or fear mindset can change your relationships for the better.
Jim Carrey’s inspirational message reminds us who we are and what really matters. I couldn’t agree more with Jim’s wisdom when he says that the “effect you have on others is the most valuable currency there is…In the end, what truly mattered was what lived in your heart.” As you reflect, consider whether you are living with a love or fear mindset.
When you think of yourself, what is in your heart? Do you love yourself? Do you feel you deserve compassion and connection and love? Are you living your life from love or fear? Have you put your faith in your fears? Examining the mindset—love or fear—behind your answers can be eye-opening.
If this resonates, trauma informed coaching can help you feel safe in love again.
Nothing, and I mean nothing has happened TO you! All of life is really happening FOR you! I’ve said this many times. Jim says it here in his beautiful way. How to choose Love! Our lives fill with circumstances, events, situations, and happenings. We decide what they mean. Ultimately, whether the meaning comes from love or fear mindset will define the meaning you give each event.
We collect evidence to be right about whatever we believe about ourselves, our lives, or our possibilities for our futures. This evidence limits us keeping us locked into our fears of not being enough or never being happy or getting what we want out of life.
Let go of the evidence.
Be in the present moment with what is right in front of you – not in the past or future, but right now! Whenever you’re faced with a decision, ask yourself this important question: Pause for a moment to decide if you’re operating from love or fear mindset.
<p>Is this an act (or thought or words) of love or an act of fear?
Really listen for the answer. Take some time to write down what you imagine will happen if you take the action and why you’re making the choice. Before working with me, my clients make choices to protect themselves because they don’t want to hurt. But this choice is fear based and won’t ever get them the love they want. You actually have to open your heart to have love in your life. Yes, even if you’ve been hurt! If you’re ready to learn how to choose from love, I’m here to be your guide!
